A To-Do list (of sorts)

Everyone seems to have a bucket list. You know, things you'd like to do before you die. Most of them involve bungee-jumping, or going to another country.
I prefer a to-do list. Because most of the time, that bucket list just sits in the back of your head and you just mope and groan about it until, viola, you're dead.
A to-do list implies that you're going to get something done, and soon.

So here's my to-do list, which I'm gonna get a jump start on NOW. It includes things I'd like to get done in a week, a month, a year, 5 years, and 10 years. But not in any particular order.

1.Play concert without breaking down from nerves.
2.Pass all classes (preferably with grades above a C!)
3.Take some more classes (and repeat process)
4.Get a better job...preferably one that doesn't make coffee.
5.Obtain car...or learn stick shift.
6.Make decent earrings.
7.Sell decent earrings.
8.Start teaching private flute lessons
9.Take a road trip
10.Record music, and post on youtube
11.Go para-sailing
12.Learn to play guitar/dizi/erhu/sitar/guzheng
13.Learn chinese
14. Learn to cook edible food
15.Move to coastal city
16.Dye hair red/violet (always wanted to try it once!)
17.Get back tattoo (not a tramp stamp DX)
18.Get in better physical shape
19.Try wearing circle lenses
20.Attend He is We/NeverShoutNever concert
21.Try surfing
22.Produce a stage show
23.Visit Japan/Ireland/Scotland/Spain
24.Study in France
25.Finish my freaking novel (or at least update it)
30.Cosplay, and cosplay well.
31.Commute everywhere via rollerblade
32.Publish some writings
33.Trip and miss the ground entirely.

So tell me, whats 0n your to-do list?

Ring Ring Ring

you remind me of dresses and puppies and pretentious dinner parties as you tear your hair out and stomp out the door.

you tell me goodbye, burning eyes streaming acid, and find me 20 minutes later, cowering from your fury (that you swear is simply concerned love, but you can apologize to my door - it doesn't appreciate the dent)

you apologize, a single sorry, and list all the ways in which I am wrong and you are right, and your single sorry spontaneously combusts.

ring, ring, ring

you call to tell me of your conviction, of all my wrongs and all your rights, but all I can think of are dresses and puppies and pretentious dinner parties and the dented door, not to mention all the scars you've dealt to my brain, my confidence, my life that you will never see, never hear, never understand.

ring, ring

I suggest you stop calling, because all I want is a sorry that won't spontaneously combust.

ring,

And you can apologize to my door, too.

One of those [insert time span here]

It's been one of those days.
Weeks.
Months.
Something like that.

What I mean by "one of those" is, I've been feeling like there's entirely too much going on and its all simultaneously hitting me in the face.

Besides the usual (homework, flute practice, work), its midterm season. So there are tests to study for, projects to be done, and concerts to prepare for.

Ah, for those who randomly stumbled upon this blog, or for those "friends" of mine who forgot what the entirety of my life is, I am a music major. This means the majority of my time is spent deciphering music theory and being attached to my flute.

Anyway, add all that crap plus taxes, the lovely FAFSA, and various other paperwork, my life seems rather cluttered.
Which, added onto the clutter of my dormroom, is pretty damn messy.

[something akin to this]

So, in order to offset all the busy-ness staring me in the face (or smacking me in the face, take your pick), I've decided to go comatose this weekend. Not that I'm actually going to be unconscious, but I'm not gonna work on everything I should, just because if I did, I'd go crazy.

[crazy? I was crazy once.]

Sometimes, we just need a break. So I'm taking one. Monday will roll around, and when it does, I'll be giving my usual 110% percent. But until then.
Consider me on vacation.

"Love is the discovery of ourselves in others,

and the delight at the recognition."
- Alexander Smith

Thank you, chocolate covered fortune cookie. Your sappy quote about love made me feel all warm and squishy inside.

[Mmmm warm squishy insides]

Thoughts on God....and Elvis.

So yesterday, after listening to Counting Blue Cars by Dishwalla (which, by the way, is a fantastic song, I highly suggest it), I had the chorus line get stuck in my head. Which goes:

Tell me all your thoughts on God, cause I'd really like to meet her

I've always loved this line. Being raised between atheistic parents, southern baptist grandparents, and having a random fascination with world religions, I've prayed to male gods, female goddesses, hermaphrodites, even cats.

[ameow?]

So basically, the idea of God being female was no news to me.
But honestly, at the moment all I was thinking was: "this song is really catchy!" when I posted the line as my facebook status.

Apparently, I was the only person who would have read that and thought of Counting Blue Cars. Then again, most normal people don't think of counting blue cars in general unless they're ocd. (Oh, did I just make a joke? I think I did!)

The responding comments were all fairly harmless.
" If she exists, I'd like to know where she came from."
"I'm fairly certain my God is a male figure. If he was a she, we'd all be sandwiches."
"Then its a homo-sexual male figure. What straight male would make all those fish on the reefs, or flowers for that matter, that colorful?"
"Isn't one. End of conversation."

Although no intense philosophical argument was panned out within the confines of my status, it did make me think. Not of whether or not God exists, nor of his/her gender/sexuality.

Quite simply, I re-affirmed my idea that you could make an argument for God being one thing or another with little effort.

For example, God could be an angry black lady.
Or perhaps a giant turtle that holds up the world.
A child with asperger's syndrome.
Elvis Presley.
You.

And the greatest part is? You will never loose the argument. Because no matter what the opposition says, there is absolutely nothing they can say that can prove you wrong. You could say that God is the old Chinese guy who runs the drugstore down the street, they could say that god is their pet fluffy, and there will never be a conclusion.

But for safety's sake, I'm betting on the king of rock-n-roll.

How to kill student zombification

I've noticed something today.

The students that I've been seeing are more cheerful, or more awake (your pick), possibly both, and entirely much more positive than usual.

I looked around.

No random stand handing out cupcakes/anti-depressants/shots of espresso.

Classes have not canceled.

I'm pretty sure I haven't entered the twilight zone.

So what's the deal? I'm used to dragging myself around campus watching other zombiefied students bitch about their lack of sleep/coffee or how much better their day could be.

Then it occurred to me that it wasn't just the people I was observing. I wasn't dragging myself around campus. I have been fairly alert, ridiculously positive, and un-zombiefied.

What magic had taken place on campus?

50 degree temperature. That's all we need. The weather has been fluctuating like a pmsing mother, and now that its warm, but not terribly warm, the general populace has gone into overdrive.

So thank you, weather, for making my day un-zombiefied.

Oh wait, was that not enough angst for you?

Today was fifty degrees out...and tomorrow...it is supposed to snow. SNOW. We finally get all hyped up for spring, we get rid of our coats and finally get to just wear jackets, and tomorrow we get snow.

I don't care whether it stays, or whether it just melts upon contact, but snow means its going to be cold again.

I'm rather sick of the cold.

...I suggest staying inside. Otherwise, prepare your brain for zombification.

And So it Begins

This is my fourth blog. The first died of unnatural causes. The second died before it was born. The third was about music and it flourished...until I decided it was entirely too much effort to keep doing.

So here is the fourth.

Which is not always about music. But will be sometimes.

It will also be about shitty poetry. Books and movies might tag along.

It may also contain some rantings about everyday life, family ties, and the lack of time that I have to write in this blog.

It might get into existentialism, religion, or other ideas that make people angry.

It will contain angst.

And other pretty shiny things.